Dancing with God

When I meditated on the word GUIDANCE,
I was drawn to"dance" at the end of the word.
I reflected upon how doing God's will is a lot like dancing.
When two people try to lead, nothing feels right.
The movement doesn't flow with the music,
and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.

When one person realizes this and lets the other lead,
both bodies begin to flow with the music.
One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back
or by pressing lightly in one direction or another.
It's as if two become one body, moving beautifully.
The dance takes surrender, willingness,
and attentiveness from one person
and gentle guidance and skill from the other.
My eyes drew back to the word GUIDANCE.

When I saw "G," I thought of God, followed by "u" and "i."
"God, "u" and "i" dance." !
God, you, and I dance.

This statement is what guidance means to me.
As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust
that I would get guidance about my life.
Once again, I became willing to let God lead.

My prayer for you today is that God's blessings
and mercies be upon you and your family
on this day and everyday.

May you abide in Him as He abides in you.
Dance together with God, trusting Him to lead
and to guide you through each season of your life.
I Hope You Dance !!!!!!!!!!!!

Life is Precious - "Give God Thanks For It"

Turning TWO!

My boy is turning TWO - ya, they say 'it's the terrible TWO' but I would like to call it 'Terrific TWO'!!

Afterall, why position it so negatively when challenges are ahead?

He's becoming more fun as the days go by - chatty, playful, bumping around, mischievous. Thankfully, he could still bring a book and sit down with me.

I'm enjoying him every single bit esp when the projects for the year had ended. He still makes mad screamed but I couldn't help but laugh at his silly moves. I'm still impressed with the new words he learns each day. He says 'bicycle' so clearly. So cute when he says a few mandarin words and he can read few too!! Thanks to Baobei...

He had some rashes on his body yesterday and I got worried... those patches looked like allergic reactions to some food. But thank God they are all gone now.

Mothers are mothers... we can't help being worried over little things like that.

He had another two bumps on his head yesterday on the stairs - ouch! Thank God he didn't roll down the stairs. That would be devastating!

Boys will always be boys...

Finally

If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moments, worship God.
Painful moments, trust God.
Every moment, thank God

Finally... our events for the year had ended.

In our line of work, we look forward to few specific moments:
The day we start our event marketing of the year
The day of each seminar
The day we end ALL our events for the year

This has been a challenging year for us. It's the first time we are running 3 events and looking back, we wouldn't have made it without God's grace and provision.

It is such a relief... sigh. The months of marketing, calling, keeping track of sign ups... and we can sit back a little before planning for 2007.

I'm looking forward to spending more time with Clayton... how I miss being there for him.

Ok... I'm tired. I'll be writing more often from now on.

I'm really busy

3 days to go to UP Your Service! with Ron Kaufman. I'm looking forward to finish these two events this month.

I look forward to spend more quality time with Clayton. I feel bad leaving him alone with the TV and his old toys.

I look forward to check out his recognition of Mandarin characters. I just found out that he could read 'Pa Pa' (in Mandarin!).

I look forward to do finger painting with him.

I look forward to sing and dance with him.

I look forward to blog more.

I look forward to get on with my internet marketing stuff.

I look forward to plan for our Perth trip.

I look forward to meet Tracy and David in Shanghai.

I look forward to exercise more.

Yes, I look forward to all these things.

What's up?

Eh.. it's been a week since I last update my blog...blame it on blogger slow connection. Blame it on a busy schedule. Blame Clayton!!

Well, it was a busy weekend in Singapore. Busy walking in Orchard road and catching up with good friends. Busy with family and getting the latest updates on Singapore shopping scene!

In Singapore:
I had coffee with owner of MEV, Sharon. It was nice catching up at Borders cafe. So thankful that Clayton was fast asleep. Having tea with a friend (uninterupted) is a luxury these days.

Met with my good old friend (Clayton's godpa), Daniel. Always nice to have someone playing with Clayton. The handmade soba at Paragon was delicious!

Took Clayton for a 'treat' a The Better Toy Store. That's one place I could leave him there and do my toy shopping! Free sampling of all the toy cars, bike..

Had dinner with the Choongs, Charm and Stephie at The Soup Restaurant. Nice, traditional food at affordable prices.

Lunch with my mum, brother's family was always nice. Clayton was an angel each time... I'm so thankful. My bro impressed me with his patience on Jonathan!

What else?

Oh... I bought another Camper... it was on sale mah... (Sh....Sh...)

Had dinner again with my good, ol' FLUV partners at the Soba restaurant again! I love dining with friends who would babysit Clayton... Lawrence adores Clayton!

It's back to KL... and work.

Been a good week with a good upsurge in sign-ups for our upcoming events.

Clayton is down with a little cold and cough - I think it's teething time again. He's still cheeky, playful and a little 'naughty' some days.

Had a ladies' outing with Tracy at Chef Loong, our favourite Dim Sum place in Bangsar. The highlight was a browse at Goss:ps.

I'm feeling sad that my good friend, Tracy is leaving for China soon. I have very few friends here and Tracy is one of them. It's nice to have a friend who can eat, shop and chat with you. Friends at the right frequency, who share the same chemistry and enjoys each other company.

Going to miss Tracy and David. Clayton too...

A little down

I'v been busy. And deep down, I've been down.

I'm not a very patient person by nature but I think I've been fairly composed these days. Sometimes, I felt 'bullied' and people just take my kindness for granted.

I've made a conscious effort to speak nicely and avoid rude remarks since Clayton came into my life. I fail at times but I bounce back each time. I'm human so I err but I learn along the way.

So it makes me sick when rudeness is observed in front of my son. I want him to be nice, not rude to anyone.

Someone said this before.... "Don't use people, use things." Yet, many times, we are used. Or we use people.

I need a hand on my shoulder. Ever felt that way? It sounds weird but no matter how strong you may be - there are moments when you just need a hand or a pat on your shoulder.

A hug from a true friend. A friendly face. A warm smile. A quiet moment. A hand squeeze. A caring gesture. A comforting word.

I think I need these...

My fashion sense

I stumbled upon 2 new boutiques lately. Nice and femine stuff.

Intoxi.kate - a local label with some beautiful coordinates for all occasions

Gossips! - another 'shop lot' kinda store (a very common concept in KL recently) stocking fashionable and girly stuff from HK, India, Korea...etc. Reasonably priced and I love it!

Well, I'm not one who follows trends. I just like to dress comfortably and be 'me'. Til today, I still don't wear minis - not blessed with nice, slim legs! I don't like bohemian style and not a fan of vintage. I have a couple of vintage pieces that I think is still stylish, not overly 'vintage' looking.

Empire cuts and A-line tops and dresses are still my favourites. I don't care if they make me look preggy. I like unique and simple cuts. Nothing too dressy or complicated.

And I still love shopping and buying. I can be a shopaholic. But I'm selective. And I'm fussy with shoes.

Camper won't go wrong.

Bump on the head

Clayton had another 'bao' on his head today... this is the second one within a month!

I felt so sorry for the little boy... it must have been painful, looking at the swelling.

At this age, he's so adventurous and 'fast'. And it's worrying.

He's getting more agile these days and chirpy too. He's learnt some new words too - apple, egg, goat, class, 'ag-loo' (igloo). That was cute!

It's exciting hearing him speak new words... makes me feel proud!

And yes, www.strictlynutrition.com is up! My project with Stephen's coaching club. Been so busy that I can barely catch up with the coaching modules.

Our september events are coming closer... and closer... there is so much to do. And yes, we need divine blessings. It's been tough.

Home again

Clayton and myself were in Singapore last weekend.

It was a tiring trip but nevertheless, it was nice to be 'home' again.

It wasn't easy to keep an active toddler in the coach for 5 hours. He wriggled many times to get out of his seat and it was challenging getting him back. At some point, he got bored stiff and started screaming - I thought it was funny.

I haven't been to my home church for very long. It was great seeing familiar faces and most of all, hearing Pastor Lim's preaching - I kinda miss it. Somehow, I don't get that sort of preaching in churches here - am I biased?

For the 1st time, I could sit in service and had someone looked after Clayton - that was a good break. Thank God for Sunday school teachers and helpers. Evangel is cool.

Then, I was sad to hear about an unpleasant news of a very close friend. Sometimes, there is just no words that can comfort and that's when I can only pray.

I had a blondish creative highlights on my hair - I looked so different. It was good for a change, at least while I'm still young. I'm still trying to get used to the new look, I'm beginning to like it tho'... this vanity was made possible by my good friends who so willingly babysitted Clayton.

I had couple of fantastic babysitters last weekend too - The Lims and my two great friends/biz partners. These 2 guys were so smart to bring Clayton to the Toy Store. They had so much fun.

Last but not least, I was so glad I visited my grandma. My heart had been so heavy before the trip and now that I saw her, I felt the peace. I felt more at ease.

Ok, it's back to some internet work and I'm all geared for a renewed vision for Ron's upcoming events in September. A renewed vision, a new mind. Yup, that's what I desperately need.

Another one...

Yet another sleep deprived night for Clayton and me... (yawn..)

Tough Love

There are so much we can learn from a child.

I have decided to wean Clayton from night feeds and this task is daunting.

We both ended up with few hours of sleep for the past 2 nights and I almost freaked out at 4am on Sunday morning. I felt terrible and sad after witnessing a traumatic Clayton wailing away.

It was tough love... it wasn't nice at all.

These few days have been tiring and I sometimes wish I get some support to take me through. Somehow, there is a supernatural source of strength to lead me on. And seeing my little boy and his sweet smiles has helped to make that extra sacrifice.

I don't know if it's normal to have feel 'resentful' at times. Resentful because my time is no longer 'mine'. I need to share it with one who needs me more. Someone who is at this point helpless.

Then my focus returns. It's what they call 'unconditional' love. Even if it means having less time for yourself but ultimately, I find myself gaining more. More when I see that happy smile, that squeeze of the little hand in mine... and that cheeky giggle that's pure and comforting.

What a weekend!

I was all geared up to take a Saturday afternoon off with my good friend, Tracy to go for a relaxing 2.5hrs spa/massage.

This is a real classy spa housed in StarHill Gallery... a great upmarket shopping mall by the YTL group in M'sia.

Well, the truth is I don't get this privilege to take time off from Clayton.. it requires some careful planning eg. putting him to sleep before sneaking away.

But this expensive spa experience was the worst I had ever experienced and for once, I couldn't wait to end the session and I almost walked out not wanting to pay! It was appalling!!

It was an irony that I was there to 'de-stress' but I ended up more stressed!!!

Somehow, this spa reminds me of a BMW design with a kancil engine. Oops!

The service industry here truly needs a wake-up call.

I'm well - Thank God!

Few days ago, I had this bad wheezing... and for the first time, I was frightened. I ran up a flight of stairs and I was panting hard, I felt that I needed an oxygen tank!

I don't like medications. Always wonder what they will do to me. I have been taught that western medications suppress an illness and the side effects are inevitable when taken long-term.

But for the good of my mental and physical self... and the goodness of my loved ones, I humbly accept the doctor's instructions.

I'm so thankful that for the 1st time (after so - so long) I had no trouble with this irritable night cough - God has healed me.

I'm now more determined to nurse myself by to health - it's been so long.

I'm all well - Jesus heals.

The Power of the Net

For the past one week, I have been searching 'everywhere' in Google for my 'lost' professor.

Being a sentimental person, I was determined to find him when his old email was no longer valid. I don't think I have done so much search for a missing friend before.

I wrote to many ex-colleagues of his and even searched in a Danish free-mail site (his last email was from Denmark) but my efforts were to no avail until today! I found an updated site with his name on it and through a couple of emails from his colleagues in the Design Research Society, I found his email address!

Today, he replied my email and the rest is history!

The truth is the internet is such a powerful tool for any purpose on this earth! You can search almost anything under the sun... with some creativity and wit, of course.

Oh well, the Net has led me to know few nice people whom I had never met. It's not usual of me to meet 'strangers' like this but it's amazing how you can connect with someone so instantly at times - I suppose they call this 'chemistry'?

Communication made easy. That's the power of the Net.

Under the Weather

Well, I haven't blogged for a week.. other than the following reason.. sometimes, I get too tired waiting for Blogger to load the page! It's just too long a wait.

So when I get too impatient, I'll blog at dorischua.com instead.

This has been a challenging week. Having plagued by flu, then cough.. my rhinitis seems to have worsened.

Friends who are close to me know that I like to stay away from doctors. Not because I don’t believe in them but I just don’t quite believe in dosing myself with medications.

My natural health research and knowledge often reminds me that medication suppresses a condition… but I finally went to a doctor.

After the 5 days’ of antibiotics and 5 other tablets, I felt that my cough was getting worse… what’s going on? This increases my doubts about doctors and medication and worse still, it leaves me confused, a little depressed and tired.

For the first time, I find myself having breathing difficulties... it feels like I had just completed a cross country run! For once, I felt scared.

I’m beginning to realise how important health is again. Most of us appreciate it when we are feeling under the weather or when someone we know are seriously ill.

I once read that we spent lots of our time making money at the expense of our health and the irony is, we use that same money we make to get back our health.

Feeling blue. I’m reminded that with God, all things are possible and I will continue to believe. And pray. And trust.

Through the eyes of a child

Oh well... it's been a while since I last post... so many things are happening at one time.

Then Clayton and myself are both down flu and cough and this poor boy is waking up so many times in the past couple of nights.

Sometimes, I think being a baby is not easy. First they can't even speak and convey clearly in words what they want, then they can't explain what's going on inside them.

Yet, mothering Clayton has taught me quite a few things. One of these is the virtue of patience. The other, forgiveness.

He has showed me how to look at many things in adult life through the eyes of a child. No wonder Jesus says that whoever wants to enter the kingdom of heaven must have faith like a child.

The other night, he woke up at an ungodly hour of 2am and kept insisting to have his 'fix'. I refused to give in cos he's been trained not to be fed til after 4am.

So he went on and on crying and wailing away.

I felt bad the next morning cos I found out that he was unwell. But he didn't remember about how tough I was towards him... he just sprung up and carried on with his favourite books and activities.

He still gave me the usual cheeky smiles and cuddly hugs.

Sometimes, I wish for the innocence of a child. They are trusting and with them, there is no pretense.

How lacking are the virtues of trust and honesty in the world we live in today.

Relationships today would be more harmonised if we all learn how to be children inside us. Don't pretend, put away our protective 'mask' and just be ourselves.

That's why it's important that we unlearn what we have learnt.

Touch of the Master's hand

I didn't know I miss him so much.

I have almost forgotten what it's like to just focus on Him and not worry about chasing Clayton around.

I needed that time alone with Him, locking into His presence and just worshipping.

These days, this moment is hard to come by. To Clayton, church is a playground and I don't blame him. I can only thank God that he's a active growing boy.

But tonight, as I stand before Him, I find myself missing Him. Then this verse came to my mind as I just enjoy the worship...

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock, if any man hears my voice, I will come in to him and sup with him and he with me." (Rev 3:23)

Then I realised.... He misses me too.

First Words

We started Clayton in a Mandarin Reading Class couple of weeks ago. We believe in the potential of little minds.. even when they haven't fully learnt how to speak.

It is amazing and equally fun that Clayton understands 'good bye' (in Mandarin) now. His first word is 'Tou' (head) and it's cute when he attempts to say his name in Mandarin - Kai Zhe (it sounded like Kai Ke).

Lately, we've been trying to understand him. He's been mumbling the word, 'sell-boot' and we couldn't make out what he was trying to say.

One evening, while I was doing the usual flash card reading with him, he saw a boat and yelled out 'sell-boot'. That's it! He was trying to say 'sail boat'!

All thanks to the Baby Einstein 'On the Go' DVD he's been watching...

Bonding Times

Nothing beats this...

Realities

I read a sad article few days ago in The Star Paper. A young mum committed suicide with her 2 small children at the railway track. And it all began with an argument with her husband who had lost his job recently.

The newspaper reported that they had some financial difficulties. What most people assumed would be a common tiff between husband and wife turned out to be an ending so devastating.

Then there was this story this morning about children of sex workers growing up in Chow Kit, an area just a stone's throw away from the renowned Petronas Twin Towers.

These sex workers are either drug addicts or women who are forced into prostitution. The highlight of the article is about the plight of these children who often sleep along alleys while waiting for their mothers to finish with their clients.

Some of these children have started to write their names at the age of 10, when children at this age are exploring the digital age.

Then we have the urban and financially stable parents/couples who sometimes argue over small matters but due to lack of self control, display acts of violence and words of abuse upon each other.

I couldn't help but wonder about the troubles of human race. Growing up in a less than perfect family makes me feel alot about these things.

This is especially after I became a mum myself, when I start to understand how strong my mum has been.

It brings me also a sense of gratitude cos she has stood firm for my brother and myself. This hasn't been easy unless you know the emotional traumas my dad put her through in the early days.

There is a loud call for women to be treated with more respect since our grandmothers' days and today. Yet, in this modern age of technological advancement and innovation, education has done little to influence this basic and simple truth among some.

May all women remain strong and steadfast in our call as members of the so-called weaker gender. May we live with dignity as individuals, wives and mothers to our children.